I am annoying the bejesus out of myself this week. My level of annoyance with myself is so high that it rivals the annoyance caused by walking into the laundry room to find a pair of jeans on the floor right next to the hamper. Right. Freaking. Next to it. You were so close! You were in the right room! You made it all the way to the hamper! You couldn't have just gone the extra mile and extended your arm about 2 inches before dropping the jeans from your grasp?
Ah! I need to focus! This is not about other people being annoying, it is about me being annoying.
Focusing really shouldn't be that hard but for some reason, I have zero ability to focus this week. I have interrupted my own projects so many times that nearly every single thing I have attempted to do can be considered a project. Pour the kids a cup of juice? No big deal. Well, no big deal if I wouldn't have stopped to read a message from work, realized that I need to take out the garbage, started trying to figure out where the stench in the kitchen is coming from since it seemed to be coming from somewhere other than the trash, cleaned off the sticky spot on the counter that I found as I walked towards to the sink to see if it was the smelly culprit, grabbed my phone again to add counter top cleaner to the grocery list, done a mental check of what day of the week it was and who got paid when this week, and...
JUICE!
It was just supposed to be a cup of juice. My kids just wanted a cup of juice and it it took me like 10 minutes and somehow by the end of it I was in a state of financial panic and felt the need to clean.
Seriously....I am SO annoying this week. I guess it wouldn't be so bad if the only thing that was uber annoying about me this week was my total inability to focus on anything, but sadly, there is enough about me that is annoying that I actually had enough material to start a damn list of reasons I am annoying the crap out of myself. The list could probably go on forever, but for the sake of trying to make ONE thing not take me an unnecessarily long amount of time this week, I'm just going to go with the top 10 reasons I am seriously annoying the crap out of myself.
1. I have spent all week getting unreasonably frustrated with people who are stupid. I am typically a little more tolerant than I am this week. But these past few days, I actually can feel myself making faces at people who are trying to tell me I am wrong while they are standing in front of me spewing WRONG information.
2. I try to explain myself to people who are not even listening. And then I get frustrated with myself instead of them.
3. I can't stop speaking my mind. I just can't. It's like I have the flu. Except my vomit is actually just a whole bunch of bitchy words.
4. I cry when I am frustrated. I try really hard to not let myself get frustrated by the stupid people, then I try to explain myself to the stupid people, then I feel like my words are a total waste of time but I just keep going like I'm going to miraculously end the cycle of stupid and then before I know it...I can feel my eyes filling up with tears because I am just. so. frustrated.
5. I keep starting projects at bedtime that would normally qualify as weekend projects and then I tell myself that if I just finish the project before going to bed that I will be able to relax after the kiddos go to bed tomorrow. And then tomorrow rolls around and I start a new project. I mean what the hell is wrong with me? Why in the world would I decide to paint my entire entryway and accent walls in my living room and dining room on a Monday. You know what I did this weekend? I painted one wall. You know what I did Monday and Tuesday after the kids went to bed? I painted 5 walls. And are all of the walls the same color? Nope. Because why not start a multi-colored painting project on a Monday? Seriously. I am SO annoying.
6. I sleep wherever I am when I am tired. And seeing as how I have gotten tired painting the downstairs rooms of the house, I have not seen my bed in 3 days. I just keep sleeping in whatever room I just painted.
7. I turn my frustration over my own annoyance with myself into my husband being frustrated with me. Keep in mind that I am not annoying him any more than I always annoy him, I am just manifesting my annoyance with myself into him being annoyed with me and turning my own self annoyance into a major argument between the two of us waiting to happen...in my own damn head. We have fought in my head all week.
8. I forget things. Like important things. Phone calls, e-mail responses, bills, deodorant...you name it. I have forgotten it.
9. I keep making unrealistic to-do lists. I mean honestly, my to-do list is so long that I just keep walking around feeling like I haven't accomplished anything. I painted half of my house this week and I feel like I have done nothing of importance because the little check mark next to that task is on the 5th page of my to-do list and my 1st page of to-dos has zero check marks and I can't put the 5th page of my to-do list on the top because I numbered my to-do list and it would bother me if it sat on my counter out of order and honestly, it bothers me that there is paper on my counter anyway this week because, well, EVERYTHING I DO THIS WEEK IS ANNOYING.
10. I misplaced the ibuprofen.
Please tell me I'm not alone, people! I can't be the only one annoying the crap out myself...can I?!?!
And while you are at it, if you happen to know where I left the ONE thing to take away this headache I have given myself, PLEASE let me know!
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